maybe this year will be better than the last

New Year's Resolutions:

• drink less caffeine (i.e. diet coke and coffee)
• drink more water
• read the Bible more
• pray. receive. yield. enjoy the mere presence of the Lord.
• do The Daily, daily
• GET A JOB - like a big girl, 9-5 type of deal
• better sleep habits
• journal more often (online and personal)
• read more books - i'm not going to kid myself and think i'll do 50, so i'm just shooting for 12
• have more meaningful honest conversations
• run in another race
• do something out of the ordinary or unexpected
• make a budget and stick to it
• spend less time on the internet
• scrapbook
• make more home videos
• become more conscious of the foods I eat
• move out

now playing: Gold Motel

it's still December, so it's still Christmas..

This Christmas was extra special because it was the first for both my niece and nephew.  It's always more exciting to have little ones to shop for.  As adults, some of the magic of the holiday seems to disappear.  It's become less about me being surprised about what is under the tree for me and more about giving to the ones I love.  So, needless to say, it was super fun buying gifts for my nieces and nephew and watching them open them.  I started taking a few videos at some of our holiday gatherings because pictures only do so much.  I want to capture the tiny voices and laughter so I can revisit the moments again and again.  Home videos from when I was a kid are the only way I remember my dad's voice, so I want to take more of them.

The quality of the ones I'm about to post is not great because I just took them on my digital camera.  Also, I sound weird.  Why is that our voices sound so much different on film or answering machines than they sound in our own head?  I can't help but laugh listening to myself.

This one is my niece opening up some of her Christmas gifts.  Oh, and my sister-in-law pretending to be thrilled about her new flannel pajamas.  [My grandmother is notorious for buying everyone the most random presents.  This year she got just about everyone a zip-up hoodie from Old Navy that has ear phones in the hoodie string.  I think half the people she purchased them for don't have any type of mp3 player.  Oh well, gotta love her!]

I don't know how this came about, but my cousin Tanner put two balls in his shirt and started bouncing them around.  He took my wine glass and started acting like a total lush.  He was some sort of drunk Dolly Parton. I thought it was hilarious, but I was a few glasses in.  Who am I kidding, I laugh at it sober.  He struts through the house and interrupts our cousin Gage, who is intently playing some football game, and begins shaking about. 

And a practice round...? I'm not sure what he was going to do with the lampshade, but I bet it would have been hysterical, too.

solitude is a blessed thing

If you are at first lonely, be patient. If you’ve not been alone much, or if when you were, you weren’t okay with it, then just wait. You’ll find it’s fine to be alone once you’re embracing it.

We could start with the acceptable places, the bathroom, the coffee shop, the library. Where you can stall and read the paper, where you can get your caffeine fix and sit and stay there. Where you can browse the stacks and smell the books. You’re not supposed to talk much anyway so it’s safe there.

There’s also the gym. If you’re shy you could hang out with yourself in mirrors, you could put headphones in (guitar stroke).

And there’s public transportation, because we all gotta go places.

And there’s prayer and meditation. No one will think less if you’re hanging with your breath seeking peace and salvation.

Start simple. Things you may have previously (electric guitar plucking) based on your avoid being alone principals.

The lunch counter. Where you will be surrounded by chow-downers. Employees who only have an hour and their spouses work across town and so they — like you — will be alone.

Resist the urge to hang out with your cell phone.

When you are comfortable with eat lunch and run, take yourself out for dinner. A restaurant with linen and silverware. You’re no less intriguing a person when you’re eating solo dessert to cleaning the whipped cream from the dish with your finger. In fact some people at full tables will wish they were where you were.

Go to the movies. Where it is dark and soothing. Alone in your seat amidst a fleeting community. And then, take yourself out dancing to a club where no one knows you. Stand on the outside of the floor till the lights convince you more and more and the music shows you. Dance like no one’s watching…because, they’re probably not. And, if they are, assume it is with best of human intentions. The way bodies move genuinely to beats is, after all, gorgeous and affecting. Dance until you’re sweating, and beads of perspiration remind you of life’s best things, down your back like a brook of blessings.

Go to the woods alone, and the trees and squirrels will watch for you.Go to an unfamiliar city, roam the streets, there’re always statues to talk to and benches made for sitting give strangers a shared existence if only for a minute and these moments can be so uplifting and the conversations you get in by sitting alone on benches might’ve never happened had you not been there by yourself

Society is afraid of alonedom, like lonely hearts are wasting away in basements, like people must have problems if, after a while, nobody is dating them. but lonely is a freedom that breaths easy and weightless and lonely is healing if you make it.

You could stand, swathed by groups and mobs or hold hands with your partner, look both further and farther for the endless quest for company. But no one’s in your head and by the time you translate your thoughts, some essence of them may be lost or perhaps it is just kept.

Perhaps in the interest of loving oneself, perhaps all those sappy slogans from preschool over to high school’s groaning were tokens for holding the lonely at bay. Cuz if you’re happy in your head than solitude is blessed and alone is okay.

It’s okay if no one believes like you. All experience is unique, no one has the same synapses, can’t think like you, for this be releived, keeps things interesting lifes magic things in reach.

And it doesn’t mean you’re not connected, that communitie’s not present, just take the perspective you get from being one person in one head and feel the effects of it. take silence and respect it. if you have an art that needs a practice, stop neglecting it. if your family doesn’t get you, or religious sect is not meant for you, don’t obsess about it.

you could be in an instant surrounded if you needed it. If your heart is bleeding make the best of it. There is heat in freezing, be a testament.

'tis the season of consumerism

It's probably stupid that this bugs me, but this model is sort of blah. Could've totally picked someone better to model all of the DKNY coats. just sayin'.  But anyways, I've been wanting a not-so-dressy winter coat and I really liked this one (liked it better in navy, but it was sold out in my size).  Stuff of Rue La La can still be pretty pricey, so unless I'm completely in love upon arrival, I might be returning.

 

Forever 21's shoes are pretty cheap and I was in the market for some simple black heels.  My previous pair are from Target and were ready to be replaced.  And ever since I watched a random Regis & Kelly episode where they talked about the necessity of owning a pair of nude pumps, I have had my eye out. I'm not sure these are the right pictures of the ones I purchased because mine look cuter in person.

Of course, BOOKS! If you have read my blog, you will gather that I am a fan of God.  Lately, I've been trying to get better about spending time with God and growing in my faith.  I tend to have a hard time sitting down and reading the Bible, but I have always enjoyed and taken away a lot from books like Blue Like Jazz or The Shack, so I purchased a few recommendations from friends.

I like buying books used - makes me feel a little more earth friendly, but I have a hard time finding the books I want in Half-Priced Books.  Usually I forget the author's name, and I feel bad harassing the employees to constantly look up books for me.  Plus, Amazon always has some pretty good prices and the past two times I have ordered them online, free shipping was offered for orders over $25, which is easily spent.

Greg Boyd has actually come to my church on numerous occasions and I have always enjoyed what he has to say.  He is a smart man and, for a former atheist, very well educated about the Bible.  If you live anywhere near St. Paul, Minnesota or happen to be out that way, I would suggest checking him out at Woodland Hills Church where he is senior pastor - if for no other reason than to tell me what you thought.

And for non-spirituality-related books I went with this series.  I've seen them around and heard a little bit of buzz, so I thought I'd check them out.  I really need to start doing book swaps and only purchase the ones I cannot live without.  Or simply utilize my local library.  But there's something aesthetically pleasing about a bookshelf and I plan on having a couple in my future home.  What's on your shelf? Any other books I should be reading?

serve God, love me and mend

Love, it will not betray you, dismay or enslave you, it will set you free
Be more like the man you were made to be
There is a design, an alignment, a cry of my heart to see
The beauty of love as it was made to be. 


Love, it will not betray you, dismay or enslave you, it will set you free
Be more like the man you were made to be
There is a design, an alignment, a cry of my heart to see
The beauty of love as it was made to be. 


Love: it will not betray you, dismay or enslave you, it will set you free.

Be more like the man you were made to be

There is a design, an alignment, a cry of my heart to see
The beauty of love as it was made to be. 

the awaited one

Every year my church puts on a Christmas show. One year I will get the nerve to try out for the choir because I think it would be an absolute blast to be a part of this, other than volunteering to make hot chocolate, open doors, show people to their seats, etc.  Anyways, if you happen to be stumbling across this blog and live in the Cincinnati area, you should check it out.  Tickets are FREE and can be picked up here.  The show goes from December 17th - 24th.  Merry Christmas!

when the mess dried up you came up singing

how is that that the relationships you thought were the best; the healthiest; the ones you cherished the most can end up being the most dysfunctional?

has it been that way all along?

sometimes i think we forget what it's like to be in a mutual relationship: one that consists of give and take; compromise and honesty.  we are often too busy doing most of the work to realize we're doing most of the work.  it's so easy to fall into an unhealthy pattern and not stop to realize it until we're buried underneath.

currently listening: alkaline trio

desiderata - by max ehrmann

Go placidly amid the noise and haste,
and remember what peace there may be in silence.
As far as possible without surrender
be on good terms with all persons.
Speak your truth quietly and clearly;
and listen to others,
even the dull and the ignorant;
they too have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons,
they are vexations to the spirit.
If you compare yourself with others,
you may become vain and bitter;
for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.
Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.

Keep interested in your own career, however humble;
it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.
Exercise caution in your business affairs;
for the world is full of trickery.
But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;
many persons strive for high ideals;
and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself.
Especially, do not feign affection.
Neither be cynical about love;
for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment
it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years,
gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.
But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.
Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.
Beyond a wholesome discipline,
be gentle with yourself.

You are a child of the universe,
no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you,
no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore be at peace with God,
whatever you conceive Him to be,
and whatever your labors and aspirations,
in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul.

With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,
it is still a beautiful world.
Be cheerful.
Strive to be happy.

do i have to spell it our for you...

Why can't I ever just tell someone I like them because apparently I don't drop hints so well or they're just not interested. This has always been the case. That, or I'm the one not interested. It never just works.

I'm weird with relationships. I think I know what I want, then I run.

I think I run because I'm scared; I'm scared that I might get hurt.

Or maybe I just haven't found someone who I know is worth it.

What is is about the winter and holidays that just makes you want to be in love? It is so silly that I inevitably get bummed out about something stupid during the greatest time of the year.  I am loved so much that the son of God died for me.  How ridiculous is it that I let myself be bothered by the imperfect love I receive from others? But we all do it, I suppose.  So here's to being content and joyful for the love I have done nothing to deserve or earn.

you're not the only one who gets to change the world

Do you remember a few months ago when I alluded to a campaign taking place within my church? Well, the campaign came to a climax this past weekend and the magic number has been revealed.

$46,006,903!

I didn't realize there was a target amount of money we were hoping to raise in order to accomplish all four of the initiatives, but apparently that goal was $30,000,000.  God said "I see your 30 million and I raise you 16 million." FREAKING INSANE!!! Ah, what a crazy journey the next 3 years will be.

do you remember when you were young and you wanted to set the world on fire

This year my friends and I are all turning the big 2-5. We're so old, right? haha. It feels it at times, especially as more and more friends get married, have kids and start their careers. We celebrated my 25th back in September with a fire, food, cornhole, and fun. I don't have any good pictures from that night because I was too busy cleaning and trying to be a good hostess. I cannot really relax and enjoy myself when the party is at my house. Kinda sucks.  So I made up for it earlier this month as I helped my girl Alisha ring in her quarter-of-a-century birthday right.  We started our night off at a hibachi restaurant - you know where they cook the food right in from of you.  The chef kept joking with Alisha's son and even pulled out some doll that fake pees on you.  He enjoyed it.

alisha's parents look so bored in all the pictures i have

he was scared of the flame

All was going well until one of the waitresses came yelling past our table for a doctor or a nurse.  Apparently an elderly woman had a heart attack or something and was not breathing.  My friend, Laura, being a nurse got up and ran over to help.  It was a complete shock and we were all sort of speechless as we waited for the paramedics to come and know what was going on.  When Laura returned she said she was unable to locate a pulse and we all came to the devastating conclusion that the woman did not make it.  It was a little unsettling trying to go back to our dinner and thinking about it now, we certainly pushed it out of our minds easy enough - perhaps too easily - and enjoyed the rest of our night.  [does that make us horrible people? i hope not.]

After dinner we headed to Gangsters, a dueling piano bar.  I went to my first one in New Orleans this summer and thought it was a blast.  We requested to have them sing happy birthday, figuring they'd make her do something funny, but our request was overlooked or something.  Towards the end of the night, after much liquid encouragement and most of our friends had already left, I demanded they dedicate a song to my girl. I don't even remember what the song was now, but I know they had her chugging a beer and doing all sorts of dance moves.

I love how frightened Emil looks!

Alisha's regulars at Muz's bought shots all night.

We had a little fun goofing around with the pole. 

my kissy face is angry

my Batac loves.

favorites <3

this heart will start a RIOT in me

I need to get away to a remote cabin somewhere free from all of life's distractions.
Free from technology and people.
Somewhere I can read, sleep, and contemplate life.
And simply be ALONE.
To take in the beauty of nature and all the little things I take for granted.
I need to read the Bible, period.
To pray, meditate, what-have-you...
And get my head in a good place.

Not that I can't achieve this where I live and in my everyday life.
But it's certainly easy not to.
And to get caught up in all the crap we're bombarded with on a daily basis.
That does nothing to improve quality of life.
But insist I need more of this or that to be happy.
That I need to dress a certain way; listen to a certain type of music; participate in specific hobbies in order to be a person of worth.
In this moment, I just hate it all.

surfers know how to say goodbye

I am not a fan of surfing, nor do I know Andy Irons, but this breaks my heart.

Obviously a beloved surfer. Such a touching moment. My heart breaks for his wife and the son who will never meet his father.


Read more about his story here.

When his son wants to learn about his father, he'll be told of a complex man who lived hard and fast and who struggled mightily to overcome problems that he was never able to talk about.

Lord, I believe, but help with me with my unbelief. 

there's a darkness upon me that's flooded in light

As of today, it has officially been 8 weeks since Baxter first got sick.  If you remember from my initial post on Bax, the average life expectancy once the tumor has been discovered is 6-8 weeks (Baxter has an incurable tumor on his spleen, in case this is all new to you).  We've made it to this point and he has not had any relapses, in terms of becoming weak or lethargic since he first acted that way in September (knock on wood).  Our vet called the other day to see how he was doing, admittingly afraid that he had already passed away, so I take that as a good sign.

He has still been very active with our other dog, Mocha.  Mocha is only a year old and constantly wants to play, so I think it helps keep Baxter active and feeling good.  Baxter has also been milking his illness for all it's worth; enjoying his free pass to lay on the couch whenever her wishes (something that drives my stepdad insane for whatever reason).

They both love the new diet I have Baxter on.  Of course, I can't give it to one and not the other, so Mocha is now partaking in the bone and raw food diet (BARF).  I found out our local Asian Supermarket has a wider selection of meat than Kroger's, so I started shopping their yesterday.  (the following pictures may gross you out). They say you're supposed to give them a variety of meats and vegetables because continually giving them the same thing can cause allergies.  I read online about a woman who gave her dog chicken feet, which to my surprise the Asian market carried.  So, I picked up lamb, chicken feet and duck wings.

As gross as the raw meat looks, it's Baxter's favorite part of the meal.  I usually give him his cottage cheese, flax oil, vegetable combo (along with other vitamins) first and then send him outside with the meat.  He inhales it! Well, the meat anyways.

Hopefully things will continue to go as well as they have thus far.  As corny as it sounds, Baxter is part of my family and the thought of losing him is..well, something I don't want to think about.  I'm really praying he is going to be one of those miraculous cases, where he lives for several more years with the disease.

we don't need our heads 'cause our bodies are young.

Roughly a week and a half ago, I got to see my favorites, Motion City Soundtrack, along with Say Anything, Saves the Day, and A Great Big Pile of Leaves. The show was awesome, per usual. It was AGBPOL's first night on the tour.  We were a bit late getting there and missed part of their set, but what I heard was amazing.

Ok, so I've never been the type of fan to stay for the meet 'n great with the band.  First and foremost I come for the music.  There have been occasions where I have even gone to a band's show for the first time and didn't even know what the guys looked like (way different from my NSYNC days haha).  Plus, I am a completely shy and awkward human being when it comes to starting conversation with anyone I do not know.  Alisha apparently is not that way and as we were listening to the STD set, we noticed the AGBPOL guys hanging at their merch station behind us.  She insisted we go ask for a picture and practically had to drag me over to them.  Again, being the shy person I am, we took the picture and I abruptly returned to our table, not saying a word to Pete (lead singer of AGBPOL and gentleman featured above). No, "hey you guys sounded amazing...I'm glad Jesse raved about you guys nonstop"... nothing. Proud moment.  Needless to say, this is probably the first and last picture I will ever take with any member of a band whom I've gone to see live.

Surprisingly, I never really listened to STD prior to this show.  I got some of their music a few weeks before seeing them live, and I definitely think I would have dug them more during my first years of college based on where I was at in life.  You know how there is some music you only listen to when you're feeling a certain way?  Well, that's how I feel STD is, and would have had a bigger impact on me 4-5 years ago.  But still good stuff, regardless.  Say Anything and MCS really haven't made music that completely gets me on a personal level, but it's always fun and interesting; so much talent and creativity.  And even when they sing about something dark, it's usually always an upbeat tune.  I cannot wait to hear what either of these bands will do next.

John and I being total clowns.

Emil. Me. Alisha.

Even as a fan of SA, I wish they weren't the last band at the Cincy stop of this tour because I would have much rather seen a MCS encore.  But all in all, the show was a blast.  I drug along with my friend, Alisha, and her husband, Emil, who were new to all of this music (my friend John also attended, but he was already hip). The week before, I made Alisha a few MCS/STD/SA mixes so she would be familiar with it. I was surprised to see her singing along during the MCS set, so apparently she did her homework.

Her iphone takes better pictures than my camera.

Emil making fun of the way I take self-portraits.

Clearly this is not the face I make.

holy crap balls

college is expensive! anyone have around $57,000 i can have to pay off my school loans? not to mention how much i'm going to continue paying in interest. gahhh! good grief!

Give me your eyes for just one second

Give me your eyes so I can see

Everything that I keep missing

Give me your love for humanity

Give me your arms for the broken hearted

The ones that are far beyond my reach

Give me your heart for the once forgotten

Give me your eyes so I can see

We will be your hands

We will be your feet

We will be the ones

that run to those in need

<3

unbound.

(Ohio is ranked in the top 5 of Human Trafficking states. Scary.)

It's so awesome to see the amazing things that are taking place in our city, especially by empowered youth. Right on. Faith does not simply mean sit back and just pray for God to fix the world's problems. If you feel called to fight against the injustice of this world, then do it. I'm am constantly surprised and in awe of the every day, average person creating change. I firmly believe we are the answer to problems of this world.

This weekend I hope to be volunteering with the Fair Trade Market at the Freedom Center. Between 11 a.m. and 4p.m. you can get into the Freedom Center for free. There will be donation boxes set up throughout the Freedom Center for you to help the cause of raising up abolitionist to fight modern day slavery. Along with participating in the Fair Trade Market, you will also be allowed to experience the other exhibits at the Freedom Center. Here are a list of vendors that will be selling items such as clothing, jewelry, toys, handbags, etc.. There is also a Freedom March after the market has closed, which will end up at Sawyer Point where a concert and celebration will ensue. You can park at the Central Riverfront Parking Garage for $4.50

There will also be speakers at the Freedom Center. Srey Neth, who was victim of sex-trafficking, will be sharing her story.  I highly encourage you to check out the event this weekend if you live anywhere near Cincinnati.  Read more about the Unbound Movement here.

This video breaks my heart and gives me hope all at once. To see her smile and laugh after all she has been through is amazing. What strength; what courage. Many blessings to this girl. May she live a long and healthy life so she can continue to help other victims become survivors.

AB goes to Prom

As you may or may not know, I provide homemaker/personal care for a girl with special needs.  I have been an unofficial part of her family for almost four years and every moment has been an absolute pleasure... ok, maybe not every moment. A little over a month ago, AB attended her first formal dance (Vineyard Community Church annually holds a prom for individuals with disabilities).  She was invited by another provider, Jenna, and her husband, Mike, who stood in as AB's date.  Jenna went all out in order to make this a memorable night for AB and her family. She got photography services donated and a hair/makeup stylist (which unfortunately fell through).  Jenna also had food donated for everyone to eat while getting the girl ready for her big night. Friends of AB's family even booked a limo for the night.  And most importantly, hours upon hours, days upon days were spent trying to find the perfect dress.

just 2 of the (about) 20 we tried on her

AB and her entourage

First dance with her date, Michael

Taking a break with her mom

Dancing with her dad (popcorn is our secret weapon)

laughing hysterically at Jenna booty dancing on her

This video is horrible quality and probably not too pleasant on the ears, but it's the only footage I have of AB dancing. How cute is she? I wish I had all the professional photos that were taken.  The photographer loved being a part of AB's big night and she made this great book full of the proofs. I hope this is something we'll continue to do with AB because even though it was a lot of work, it was a ton of fun.  

would you like a little cheese with that whine

For the record, I hate resumes and writing cover letters.  blah.

there's a voice, there's a voice, there's a voice in my head

Get Your Own Free Hypster.com Playlist.

1. Dead Man's Bones - "in the room where you sleep"
2. The Bird and the Bee - "i'm a broken heart"
3. Bell - "it's oh so quiet" (cover)
4. Frank Turner - "long live the queen"
5. Tegan and Sara - "hell"
6. Ok Go - "let it rain"
7. Kate Nash - "kiss that grrrl"
8. The Early Hours - "come take my hand"
9. Mumford and Sons - "the cave"
10. Lemuria - "pants"
11. Florence and the Machine - "kiss with a fist"
12. The Avett Brothers - "kick drum heart"
13. Motion City Soundtrack - "always running out of time"
14. Band of Horses - "the funeral"
15. Jenny Owen Youngs - "last person"
16. Jenny Lewis - "acid tongue"
17. Darwin Deez - "up in the clouds"

Game Change.

Give yourself an hour to see the amazing things taking place in the church.  Although this campaign is going on within Crossroads, this is not about Crossroads.  This campaign; these initiatives; are about enhancing the Kingdom of God. We are changing the world. We are writing the wrongs. We are bringing the good news of God to our friends, our neighbors, our city, our world.

oh please tell me that you're alright

My dog, Baxter, has been unofficially diagnosed with hemangiosarcoma; a metastatic tumor, which is infected his spleen. The most common presenting signs for patients with hemangiosarcoma are associated with blood loss, such as tiring easily, episodes of unexplained weakness, pale color to the mucous membranes of the mouth and eyes, increased respiratory rates, abdominal swelling and depression.  A common estimate of the average time from discovery of the tumor until death occurs in affected dogs is six to eight weeks but death occurs more rapidly than this in a number of cases.

Baxter first started acting sick a little over 3 weeks ago.  I started giving him flax oil 3 weeks ago to the day.  He's been acting like him old self for the most part.  I have prayed over him on numerous occasions just asking God to remove this tumor because I know He has the power to do so.  And if nothing else, just don't let Baxter be in pain.  The thought of losing him breaks my heart.  Is it weird how attached we get to our pets?  I don't know, I just want to love and enjoy him as much as I can while he's still alive.

http://www.thensome.com/ginger/: This the first personal story I've found, and hopeful one, about a dog living 6.5 years AFTER her diagnosis.  They also chose not to do surgery or chemotherapy; instead altered Ginger's diet. I have been giving Baxter flax oil and cottage cheese for the past 3-4 weeks because I initially thought he had multiple myeloma and read numerous stories raving about the use of flax oil and vitamins to cure cancer.  Although, this is not the same cancer that we now believe he has, I'm still going with the hope that the flax oil will also help slow the progression of his illness.  I really need to change Baxter's diet and start giving him the vitamins.

he's like a Wal-Mart version of you

Just bought my ticket to see these three bands:

Say Anything

Saves the Day

Motion City Soundtrack

I bought a ticket for my friend to tag along as a birthday present, so I can introduce her to some new tunes.  She went to the Paramore/Tegan&Sara/New Found Glory concert with me and is a fan of rock, so I'm sure she will like them.  I mean what's not to love?  I'm excited because I've never heard Saves the Day live and the Say Anything/Motion City boys always make me happy. I don't think I've missed a MCS concert in Cincinnati ever since I became a fan, even though I'm 25 and starting to feel out of place at shows.  I just hide out near the back with the old folks. 

And thanks to my mom generously donating her money to the casino, we are going on a semi-free cruise some time in the next year.  We'll have to pay to fly down to the port and some fees, but essentially the cruise itself is free; mostly because they expect that we'll be donating a lot of money to the casino on the ship.  My mom knows me well and responded to this assumption with "I'll donate enough for the both of us."  Gambling is not my cup of tea.  I'm looking forward to taking a vacation with just my mom and having quality girl time.  Plus, I have never been on a cruise before.

Kind of ironic that the past 3 weeks my church has been talking about the importance of playing and experiencing joy in our lives.  And in fact there are parts of God that we will not come to know unless we are in the midst of joy.  So here I am very amped about things to come that will indeed bring me joy! 

'til death do us part...

My mom and my step-dad have been together for over seven years and finally decided to tie the knot.  I guess they decided to get past the seven-year-itch before making official. They've had their ups and downs and almost separated for good just a year ago.  Hopefully the worst is over and they will start fresh with their married life and live "happily ever after."  She lost our cool last name, Diesel. Calling her by a new name will take some getting used to.

So something you gotta know about my step-dad: he's a prankster.  My mom is such an easy target, too.  They were going to order their corsages and my mom was complaining that she didn't get to look in a book or something to pick out what she wanted.  Step-dad assured her this is what the florist does for a living and couldn't possibly screw it up.  Well, anyways, when he picked up the corsage he decided he was going to replace it with a fake one.  He went out in the yard and got some onion grass and other foliage, taped them together, and wrapped it in plastic wrap; replacing it in the original box.  All day we were trying to get my mom to look at her corsage, but she was surprisingly uninterested in making sure it was to her standards (she is a bit obsessive and anal).  Finally, before we were heading for the court house, she had to open it up.  The look on her face was priceless! 

 Since they have both been married before, they settled with just a legal ceremony at the local municipal building.  It literally took like 5 minutes and we were out of there.  No complaints here.  And this way they saved their money to go on a cruise and to Paradise Hotel in the Bahamas.  Two week honeymoon? Not too shabby.

exchanging rings

Afterwards at dinner with my niece, Kacey.

My older brother, Ryan, and his daughter, Georgia.

Ryan's wife, Pam, and her girls.

Mom, step-dad, and their grandchildren.

My nephew, Landon, enjoying his first bite of cake.

My camera was slow, so I had to make them hold it.

Mr. and Mrs. Moran